As we approach the Thanksgiving season, many of us find ourselves taking stock of the moments, people, and experiences that add meaning to our lives. That simple act of noticing does more than lift our spirits, it strengthens how we think and improves our ability to make decisions.
If you already have a gratitude practice or have had one in the past, you may know how powerful it can be. However, much like exercise and healthy eating, it’s often something that falls by the wayside when life gets too busy. This time of year offers a natural invitation to reflect on how our own gratitude practice can quietly sharpen our judgment, clarify our priorities, and help us make decisions with a steadier perspective.
The Compounding Effect of Gratitude
Gratitude works a lot like compounding interest. Small, consistent deposits accumulate over time, silently growing in the background. Each time we pause to appreciate something, we strengthen the habit of noticing the good in our lives. Over time, this habit helps train our minds to focus on these positive things, even during difficult times.
My own gratitude practice is simple and imperfect. I try to write down three things I’m grateful for each day. I have a dedicated section in my journal for it and even then I’m not always consistent. Life gets busy and I forget. However, I notice that when I return to the practice, things start to flow better. My mood lightens, my perspective broadens, and often small doors open. Sometimes, this appears as a new opportunity; other times, it simply comes as clarity on a decision I’ve been contemplating.
This isn’t just a coincidence. Studies show that gratitude fosters clearer thinking and patience by reducing stress and improving emotional regulation, leading to wiser financial and personal decisions. A Harvard Health review notes that gratitude “helps people refocus on what they have instead of what they lack,” which in turn strengthens self-control and decision-making.[1] Other research from the University of California, Davis, led by psychologist Robert Emmons, shows that grateful people make more balanced choices because they focus on long-term satisfaction instead of short-term gain.[2]
In other words, gratitude doesn’t just make us feel better – it helps us think better.
The Many Ways to Give
Gratitude and giving are deeply connected. When we’re thankful, we often feel inspired to give to others. For many people, “giving” immediately evokes thoughts of financial contributions such as Donor Advised Funds (DAFs) or year-end charitable donations. While these are powerful tools for expressing gratitude and addressing funding shortfalls, there are many impactful ways to give.
Giving of time is equally powerful: volunteering, mentoring, or simply showing up for someone who needs support. Sharing expertise by offering pro-bono services or using professional skills to provide support can also be a meaningful way to give. These actions remind us that our presence and attention carry real value.
Working alongside clients over many years on financial planning and charitable goals has reinforced the notion that there’s no single “right” way to give. Giving should feel authentic and sustainable, and it should align with your current season of life.[3]
Giving Evolves with Our Lives
The beauty of gratitude and generosity is that they can evolve with us. In our younger years, giving may show up as time and energy. This can come in the form of volunteering or simply helping friends. As we move into midlife, giving often shifts towards financial contributions or mentoring, as resources grow but free time becomes scarce. Later in life, generosity might come in the form of legacy giving, volunteering, or even shifting careers to more purpose-driven rather than financially-driven work.
In recent years, my own giving has shown up mainly in volunteering for my son’s school and extracurricular activities. It’s valuable time helping bring his activities to life and, of course, connecting with him. Our giving provides an example to those around us, and I’ve seen my son expand his own awareness of giving and community impact. As he grows older, I know I’ll need to reassess and reflect on what comes next and how I want to contribute in the next stage of life.
This “arc of giving” ebbs and flows with our circumstances. The key is that there is both mindfulness and intentionality around how we give and where we are in life.
Giving Thanks and Giving Back
At North Berkeley, we see the power of this practice firsthand. Our team meets for “Friday Gratitude” at the end of every week for a brief sharing of successful client work and appreciation for one another. It’s simple but powerful. No matter how busy or complex the week has been, we take the time to focus on gratitude. It boosts morale and strengthens our relationships by reminding us that we’re surrounded by good people who support one another and our clients. We also make space to extend that gratitude beyond our walls through dedicated volunteer time and by giving collectively to organizations that make a difference in our community.
As with all the positive choices we make in our lives, gratitude is a practice that takes intention and pays lasting dividends in calm, confidence, and clarity. Taking time to notice what’s good in our lives not only improves decision-making, it inspires us to share that good with others, whether that’s through time, resources, or expertise. While Thanksgiving gives us a reason to stop and give thanks, it also reminds us that gratitude is most powerful when we carry it with us throughout the year.
Resources
[1] Giving thanks can make you happier. Harvard Health Publishing
[2] Emmons, R. A., & McCullough, M. E. (2003). Counting Blessings Versus Burdens: An Experimental Investigation of Gratitude and Subjective Well-Being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
[3] For more on this topic, you can read past articles we’ve written on Optimizing Your Charitable Giving, Giving Your Time: Serving on a Nonprofit Board, and Legacy by Design, Not by Default
